Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
Quote by Woody Allen
On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done...
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...
How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...
In Beverly Hills...they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not...
My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...
Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move...
You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...
Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its...
Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job
I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go...
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
An unused life is an early death.