I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
Quote by Woody Allen
Woody Allen Quotes
Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one...
She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set...
I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave...
Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.
If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Pamela Andersons fingertips.
He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.
Seventy percent of success in life is showing up
80% of success is showing up.
The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what...
In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil....
I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love
Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it
There is an important difference between love and friendship. While the former delights in extremes...
A man in love is like a clipped coupon -- it's time to cash in.
You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither