Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Dating Quotes

Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...

Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only...

The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only...

Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love

Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...

How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when...

It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when...

The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what...

The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what...

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.