His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Woody Allen Quotes

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come...

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come...

80% of success is showing up.

80% of success is showing up.

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.

Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very...

Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very...

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with...

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with...

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept...

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept...

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.

Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not...

Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not...

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.

Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they...

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they...

The only completely consistent people are the dead.

The only completely consistent people are the dead.

A good old man, sir. He will be talking. As they say, when the age...

A good old man, sir. He will be talking. As they say, when the age...

Mom and Pop were just a couple of kids when they got married. He was...

Mom and Pop were just a couple of kids when they got married. He was...