My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Woody Allen Quotes

The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last...

The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last...

I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife

I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...

Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...

Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.

Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.

My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.

My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they...

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they...

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept...

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept...

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave...

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave...

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....

Absence and death are the same - only that in death there is no suffering.

Absence and death are the same - only that in death there is no suffering.

The disembodied spirit is immortal; there is nothing of it that can grow old or...

The disembodied spirit is immortal; there is nothing of it that can grow old or...

Really, sex and laughter do go very well together, and I wondered - and I...

Really, sex and laughter do go very well together, and I wondered - and I...