You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
Quote by Woody Allen
Woody Allen Quotes
Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.
My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by...
I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my...
If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything...
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...
Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very...
The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue...
When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid...
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much...
Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love
She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set...
There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep...
Sex relieves tension - love causes it.
I believe there is something out there watching over us. Unfortunately, it's the government.
Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got.
If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job
I won't be happy till I'm as famous as God.