I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Achievement Quotes, Funny Quotes, Immortality Quotes

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...

Marriage is the death of hope.

Marriage is the death of hope.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up

The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last...

The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last...

I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or...

I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or...

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it

She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set...

She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set...

I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me

I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some...

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some...

I am two with nature.

I am two with nature.

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will...

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will...

And my parents finally realize that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They...

And my parents finally realize that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They...

The fate of a child is in the hands of his parents.

The fate of a child is in the hands of his parents.

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will...

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will...