If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Woody Allen Quotes

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep...

There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep...

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come...

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come...

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

Sex is better than talk...Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to...

Sex is better than talk...Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to...

I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me

I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done...

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done...

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its...

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its...

When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.

When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in...

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in...

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...

I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...

I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go...

I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go...

Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's...

Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's...

You haven't lost anything when you know were it is. Death can hide but not...

You haven't lost anything when you know were it is. Death can hide but not...