I chased a woman for almost two years only to discover her tastes were exactly like mine - we were both crazy about girls.
Quote by Groucho Marx
Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.
I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff...
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.
I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that
When I was young I was amazed at Plutarch's statement that the elder Cato began...
My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually...
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old...
Life lives, life dies. Life laughs, life cries. Life gives up and life tries. But...
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men, the other 999 follow...
Room service? Send up a larger room.
Youre a woman whos been getting nothing but dirty breaks. Well, we can clean and...
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an...
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for...
I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.