Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

Quote by Groucho Marx

Topics: Groucho Marx Quotes

My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually...

My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually...

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed...

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed...

Home is where you hang your head

Home is where you hang your head

Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have...

Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have...

Humor is reason gone mad.

Humor is reason gone mad.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And...

Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And...

Blood's not thicker than money.

Blood's not thicker than money.

No man goes before his time unless the boss leaves early.

No man goes before his time unless the boss leaves early.

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.

No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.

No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.

Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy

Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy

Youre a woman whos been getting nothing but dirty breaks. Well, we can clean and...

Youre a woman whos been getting nothing but dirty breaks. Well, we can clean and...

Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.

Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.

I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff...

I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff...

I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I...

I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I...

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that

I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that

The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have stopped leading...

The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have stopped leading...

The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to...

The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to...