We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
Quote by Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield Quotes
I was so poor growing up...if I wasn't a boy...I'd have nothing to play with.
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an...
I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.
Life is just a bowl of pits.
One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control.
I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician...
My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
At my age, I'm envious of a stiff wind.
I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the...
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...
I met the surgeon general - he offered me a cigarette.
I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice - I don't know if I'm coming or...
If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.
I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a...
The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday...
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old...
I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove...