I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Quote by W C Fields

Topics: Drink Quotes

I never worry about being driven to drink; I just worry about being driven home.

I never worry about being driven to drink; I just worry about being driven home.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.

Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.

A wonderful drink, wine. . . . Did you ever hear of an Italian grape...

A wonderful drink, wine. . . . Did you ever hear of an Italian grape...

It was a woman who drove me to drink -- and, you know, I never...

It was a woman who drove me to drink -- and, you know, I never...

Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim...

Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim...

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?

Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?

I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a...

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a...

On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia.

On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia.

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a...

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a...

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

Never give a sucker an even break.

Never give a sucker an even break.

There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink...

There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink...

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget...

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget...

Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep...

Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep...

Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.

Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.