A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Humor Quotes

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that...

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that...

They'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood.

They'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot...

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot...

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for...

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

Hearken unto me, O house of Jacob, and all the remnant of the house of...

Hearken unto me, O house of Jacob, and all the remnant of the house of...

Age wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul.

Age wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul.

Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo.

Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo.