I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Age Quotes, Funny Quotes

If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of...

If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of...

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

Your ignorance cramps my conversation

Your ignorance cramps my conversation

At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to...

At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to...

If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart...

If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart...

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart...

If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart...

Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough

Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

Instead of complaining that God had hidden Himself, you will give Him thanks for not...

Instead of complaining that God had hidden Himself, you will give Him thanks for not...

For the greatest revolutionary changes on this earth would not have been thinkable if their...

For the greatest revolutionary changes on this earth would not have been thinkable if their...