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You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
#Age
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#Funny
I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.
#Age
,
#Funny
I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.
#Funny
A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
#Funny
When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot...
#Parents
Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.
#Age
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#Funny
A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing...
#Humor
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
#Age
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#Funny
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...
#Happiness
Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned...
#Funny
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#Marriage
I thought 'Deep Throat' was a movie about a giraffe.
#Funny
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#Hollywood
My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I...
#Funny
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#Parents
I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for...
#Age
,
#Funny
I have to much money invested in sweaters.
#Money
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that...
#Money
At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to...
#Hollywood
They'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood.
#Hollywood
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
#Bob Hope
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