I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Age Quotes, Funny Quotes

I have to much money invested in sweaters.

I have to much money invested in sweaters.

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a...

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a...

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the...

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into...

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

Last, but by no means least, courage - moral courage, the courage of one's convictions,...

Last, but by no means least, courage - moral courage, the courage of one's convictions,...

When you get to a certain age, there is no coming back.

When you get to a certain age, there is no coming back.

I was dating a guy for a while because he told me he had an...

I was dating a guy for a while because he told me he had an...