I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Quote by W C Fields

Topics: Funny Quotes, Random Quotes

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid...

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid...

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?

Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to...

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to...

The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.

The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.

Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a...

Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a...

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

I only drink to steady my nerves. Sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for...

I only drink to steady my nerves. Sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for...

Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like...

Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like...

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days...

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days...

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull...

There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull...

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn...

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn...

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once, dear. She drove me to drink....

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once, dear. She drove me to drink....

Stay yourselves, and wonder; cry ye out, and cry: they are drunken, but not with...

Stay yourselves, and wonder; cry ye out, and cry: they are drunken, but not with...

There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and...

There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and...