Quotes by Steven Wright

I went to a general store. They wouldn't let me buy anything specifically.

#Steven Wright

I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.

#Steven Wright

I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy...

#Steven Wright

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they...

#Steven Wright

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

#Steven Wright

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, Did you sleep good? I...

#Steven Wright

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms...

#Canada

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand...

#Steven Wright

When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do...

#Steven Wright

When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.

#Steven Wright

What's another word for Thesaurus?

#Steven Wright

What a nice night for an evening.

#Steven Wright