Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Age Quotes, Funny Quotes

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing...

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing...

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I...

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I...

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.

The sumptuous age of stars and images is reduced to a few artificial tornado effects,...

The sumptuous age of stars and images is reduced to a few artificial tornado effects,...

As a lover, I'm about as impressive as a magician on the radio.

As a lover, I'm about as impressive as a magician on the radio.

I made up my mind long ago that life was too short to do anything...

I made up my mind long ago that life was too short to do anything...