Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of sleep since Friday. No wonder you feel that lost sensation. You're sunk from a riot of relaxation.

Quote by Ogden Nash

Topics: Funny Quotes, Weekend Quotes

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.

I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

Too clever is dumb.

Too clever is dumb.

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is...

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is...

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the...

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the...

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

Nobody agrees with anybody else anyhow, but adults conceal it and infants show it

Nobody agrees with anybody else anyhow, but adults conceal it and infants show it

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so...

The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.

The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.

If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they...

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they...