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When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a...

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.

She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into...

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.