Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Bob Hope Quotes

Your ignorance cramps my conversation

Your ignorance cramps my conversation

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

They'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood.

They'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

I have to much money invested in sweaters.

I have to much money invested in sweaters.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a...

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a...

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot...

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot...

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the...