I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Bob Hope Quotes

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I...

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I...

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for...

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.

I have to much money invested in sweaters.

I have to much money invested in sweaters.

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

I did envisage being this successful as a player, but not all the hysteria around...

I did envisage being this successful as a player, but not all the hysteria around...

I've worked with it. I took three putts and hit the first one about 3...

I've worked with it. I took three putts and hit the first one about 3...

The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to...

The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to...