I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.

Quote by Bob Hope

Topics: Bob Hope Quotes

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things -...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that...

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

You've got to be rich to have a swing like that.

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington -- if only to be near my money.

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

I'm so old they've canceled my blood type.

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the...

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you...

Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough

Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing...

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing...

The door that will no longer open is usually the one that you slammed shut.

The door that will no longer open is usually the one that you slammed shut.

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.

Wise men are not wise at all hours, and will speak five times from their...

Wise men are not wise at all hours, and will speak five times from their...