I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me superman.

Quote by Homer Simpson

Topics: Funny Quotes, Religious Quotes

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems.

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems.

They took the foam off the market because they found out it was poisonous, but...

They took the foam off the market because they found out it was poisonous, but...

Oh look at me !!! I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man from happy...

Oh look at me !!! I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man from happy...

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless,...

I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless,...

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'

Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every...

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every...

I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!

I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?

Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?

This is a place for learning, not a house of... hearing about things.

This is a place for learning, not a house of... hearing about things.

That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.

That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Lisa, remember me as I am - filled with murderous rage.

Lisa, remember me as I am - filled with murderous rage.

Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!

Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!