I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me superman.

Quote by Homer Simpson

Topics: Funny Quotes, Religious Quotes

Oh look at me !!! I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man from happy...

Oh look at me !!! I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man from happy...

Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

You can't ask God to kill someone, you do your own dirty work.

You can't ask God to kill someone, you do your own dirty work.

Stupid risks make life worth living.

Stupid risks make life worth living.

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is like another nail.

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is like another nail.

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Sometimes you have to break the rules to free the heart.

Sometimes you have to break the rules to free the heart.

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs.

Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs.

I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless,...

I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless,...

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every...

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every...

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'

Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake...

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake...

Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!

Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!

Operator, give me the number for 911!

Operator, give me the number for 911!

Wii Sports: All the frustration of real sports with out the physical exercise.

Wii Sports: All the frustration of real sports with out the physical exercise.

Humor is, I think, the subtlest and chanciest of literary forms. It is surely not...

Humor is, I think, the subtlest and chanciest of literary forms. It is surely not...

Sure, the comedians who swear or use scatological humor can get laughs, but they're uncomfortable...

Sure, the comedians who swear or use scatological humor can get laughs, but they're uncomfortable...