You can't ask God to kill someone, you do your own dirty work.

Quote by Homer Simpson

Topics: Homer Simpson Quotes

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake...

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake...

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

I am not going to lie to you, Marge... ... ... Well, good bye.

I am not going to lie to you, Marge... ... ... Well, good bye.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

My campaign is a disaster, Moe. I hate the public so much. If only they'd...

My campaign is a disaster, Moe. I hate the public so much. If only they'd...

I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.

I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!

Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

They took the foam off the market because they found out it was poisonous, but...

They took the foam off the market because they found out it was poisonous, but...

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

I don't mind being called a liar when I am lying, when I am about...

I don't mind being called a liar when I am lying, when I am about...

I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless,...

I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless,...

Operator! Give me the number for 911!

Operator! Give me the number for 911!

Beer is the cause and solution to all of life's problems

Beer is the cause and solution to all of life's problems

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning,...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning,...

Though the Jazz Age continued, it became less and less of an affair of youth....

Though the Jazz Age continued, it became less and less of an affair of youth....