Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'

Quote by Homer Simpson

Topics: Homer Simpson Quotes

You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have...

You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have...

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is like another nail.

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is like another nail.

Lisa, remember me as I am - filled with murderous rage.

Lisa, remember me as I am - filled with murderous rage.

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!

I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!

Once the sun goes down, all the weirdos turn crazy!

Once the sun goes down, all the weirdos turn crazy!

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems.

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems.

Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs.

Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs.

Are we insane yet? Are we insane yet? How many times do I have to...

Are we insane yet? Are we insane yet? How many times do I have to...

I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me superman.

I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me superman.

This is a place for learning, not a house of... hearing about things.

This is a place for learning, not a house of... hearing about things.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

You can't ask God to kill someone, you do your own dirty work.

You can't ask God to kill someone, you do your own dirty work.

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Remember as far as anyone knows, were a nice normal family.

Remember as far as anyone knows, were a nice normal family.

Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care, doesn't mean I don't understand.

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it....

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it....