I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
Quote by Woody Allen
Woody Allen Quotes
I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to...
I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave...
He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.
I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
Seventy percent of success in life is showing up
Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful - provided you get...
I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what...
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl...
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...
You can't force anyone to love you or lend you money.
Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....