The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
Quote by Woody Allen
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid...
More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to...
Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...
Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it...
I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or...
I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in...
As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...
Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of...
I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...
My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go...
If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.
Sex relieves tension - love causes it.
You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...