Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
Quote by Woody Allen
Woody Allen Quotes
If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.
You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....
Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.
I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of...
I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or...
I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there...
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl...
The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue...
I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
Marriage is the death of hope.