If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job
Quote by Woody Allen
Woody Allen Quotes
Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of...
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...
His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much...
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...
I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....
If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Pamela Andersons fingertips.
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl...
I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it...
I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
Chess is a foolish expedient for making idle people believe they are doing something very...
The chess-board is the world, the pieces are the phenomena of the universe, the rules...
My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...
A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him