When the girlfriend and I get in an argument, I begin to believe in flying saucers...and plates, pots, mugs...

Quote by Robert Paul

Topics: Funny Quotes, Jokes Quotes

A woman knows she's wearing the right dress, when her man wants to take it...

A woman knows she's wearing the right dress, when her man wants to take it...

The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a...

The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a...

I only go to work on days that don't end in a 'y'.

I only go to work on days that don't end in a 'y'.

You know you''re getting old, when Santa starts looking younger.

You know you''re getting old, when Santa starts looking younger.

My computer goes down on me more often than my girlfriend.

My computer goes down on me more often than my girlfriend.

The golden rule of work is that the bosses jokes are ALWAYS funny.

The golden rule of work is that the bosses jokes are ALWAYS funny.

Always be wary of the Software Engineer who carries a screwdriver.

Always be wary of the Software Engineer who carries a screwdriver.

Last christmas my sister, Geri, gave me a lovely Cloth calendar. It only took me...

Last christmas my sister, Geri, gave me a lovely Cloth calendar. It only took me...

You're fooling yourself if you argue with a fool - others may not know the...

You're fooling yourself if you argue with a fool - others may not know the...

Love is the heart of the soul.

Love is the heart of the soul.

So one day as a kid I was at the local Zoo. I was bored...

So one day as a kid I was at the local Zoo. I was bored...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

I find it hard living in a day and age where people are unwilling to...

I find it hard living in a day and age where people are unwilling to...

King David and King Solomon Led merry, merry lives, With many, many lady friends And...

King David and King Solomon Led merry, merry lives, With many, many lady friends And...

Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase...

Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase...

Im convinced that God gave us Mondays to punish us for the things we did...

Im convinced that God gave us Mondays to punish us for the things we did...

Dont complain about the snow on your neighbors roof when your own doorstep is unclean.

Dont complain about the snow on your neighbors roof when your own doorstep is unclean.

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it...

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it...

Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo.

Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo.

An Egg to day is better than a Hen to-morrow

An Egg to day is better than a Hen to-morrow