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Quote by Fred Allen

Topics: Advertising Quotes, Funny Quotes

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known,...

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known,...

All that the comedian has to show for his years of work and aggravation is...

All that the comedian has to show for his years of work and aggravation is...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a...

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of...

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of...

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of...

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

Television is called a medium because anything good on it is rare

Television is called a medium because anything good on it is rare

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just...

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just...

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what...

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what...

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only sane thing to do if...

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only sane thing to do if...

Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people...

Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people...

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and...

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and...

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to...

The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to...

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a...

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a...