The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.

Quote by W C Fields

Topics: W C Fields Quotes

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand...

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand...

Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.

Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.

If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.

If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.

On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia.

On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia.

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim...

Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim...

Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what...

Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what...

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

Never give a sucker an even break.

Never give a sucker an even break.

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid...

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid...

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake,...

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake,...

The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was...

The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was...

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to...

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to...

It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy...

It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy...

It was a woman who drove me to drink -- and, you know, I never...

It was a woman who drove me to drink -- and, you know, I never...

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I review novels to make money, because it is easier for a sluggard to write...

I review novels to make money, because it is easier for a sluggard to write...

May you have love that never ends, lots of money and lots of friends. Health...

May you have love that never ends, lots of money and lots of friends. Health...