Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Time Quotes

The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone...

The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone...

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...

I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...

I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of...

Sex is nobody's business except the three people involved

Sex is nobody's business except the three people involved

I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves...

I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves...

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much...

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much...

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Eternity is really long, especially near the end

Eternity is really long, especially near the end

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.

If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.

If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

In a relationship; You becomes Us. I becomes We and They become Haters.

In a relationship; You becomes Us. I becomes We and They become Haters.

Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and...

Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and...

Attraction is not a choice.

Attraction is not a choice.