I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

Quote by Groucho Marx

Topics: Groucho Marx Quotes

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying...

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying...

One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas...

One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas...

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for...

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for...

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

I've learned that everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the...

I've learned that everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the...

I chased a woman for almost two years only to discover her tastes were exactly...

I chased a woman for almost two years only to discover her tastes were exactly...

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed...

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed...

No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.

No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.

Room service? Send up a larger room.

Room service? Send up a larger room.

My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually...

My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually...

All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.

All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.

I find television to be very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I...

I find television to be very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I...

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can...

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can...

Ever since they found out that Lassie was a boy, the public has believed the...

Ever since they found out that Lassie was a boy, the public has believed the...

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

Old age ain't no place for sissies.

Old age ain't no place for sissies.

During Whatever Happened To Baby Jane?, I knitted a scarf from Hollywood to Malibu.

During Whatever Happened To Baby Jane?, I knitted a scarf from Hollywood to Malibu.