Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Quote by Will Rogers
Politics ain't worrying this country one-tenth as much as where to find a parking space
The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if...
Communism is like Prohibition, it's a good idea but it won't work
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to...
One-third of the people in the United States promote, while the other two-thirds provide.
Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works...
The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
Worrying is like paying on a debt that may never come due.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's...
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has...
About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with...
The schools ain't what they used to be and never was.
The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf.
Now if there is one thing that we do worse than any other nation, it...
The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.
An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make...
You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new...
So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn...
If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you...