There's only one thing money won't buy, and that is poverty.

Quote by Joe E Lewis

Topics: Money Quotes

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my...

They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my...

I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise.

I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise.

I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves.

I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves.

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next...

I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next...

It pays to get drunk with the best people.

It pays to get drunk with the best people.

I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

We can afford almost any mistake once.

We can afford almost any mistake once.

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so...

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so...

I've been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would...

I've been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would...

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty,...

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty,...

I drink to forget I drink.

I drink to forget I drink.

I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.

I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.

You only live once - but if you work it right, once is enough.

You only live once - but if you work it right, once is enough.

Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.

Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.

I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.

I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a...

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a...

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to...

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to...