I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise.

Quote by Joe E Lewis

Topics: Joe E Lewis Quotes

I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest.

Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest.

Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.

Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so...

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so...

I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves.

I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves.

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to...

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to...

You only live once - but if you work it right, once is enough.

You only live once - but if you work it right, once is enough.

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

We can afford almost any mistake once.

We can afford almost any mistake once.

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a...

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a...

I drink to forget I drink.

I drink to forget I drink.

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor as long as you've got money.

It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor as long as you've got money.

It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor - as long as you've got...

It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor - as long as you've got...

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days...

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days...

Dieting is the only game where you win when you lose!

Dieting is the only game where you win when you lose!

Our society's strong emphasis on dieting and self-image can sometimes lead to eating disorders. We...

Our society's strong emphasis on dieting and self-image can sometimes lead to eating disorders. We...

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second...

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second...

I fall back on this journal just as some other poor devil takes to drink

I fall back on this journal just as some other poor devil takes to drink

The farewell between Hitler and Mussolini at the station was very affectionate. Both men were...

The farewell between Hitler and Mussolini at the station was very affectionate. Both men were...