Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.
That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough...
I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're...
You should stick with what you enjoy, what you find funny -- that's the humor...
I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by...
It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what's cool.
It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
It's surprising how hard we'll work when the work is done just for ourselves.
The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take this milk. Why do...
If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.
If life is just a stage, then we are all running around ad-libbing, with absolutely...
By golly, life's too darn short to waste time trying to please every meddlesome moron...
If your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously...
I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations.
Reality continues to ruin my life.
Reading those turgid philosophers here in these remote stone buildings may not get you a...
The syndicates take the strip and sell it to newspapers and split the income with...
I've got to start listening to those quiet, nagging doubts.