That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
Quote by Bill Watterson
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has...
Why isn't my life like a situation comedy? Why don't I have a bunch of...
Hobbes: Do you think there's a God? Calvin: Well, SOMEBODY'S out to get me.
If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.
I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad...
Often it takes some calamity to make us live in the present. Then suddenly we...
I liked things better when I didn't understand them.
The problem with the future is that it keeps turning into the present.
By golly, life's too darn short to waste time trying to please every meddlesome moron...
When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.
Letting your mind play is the best way to solve problems.
Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.
The syndicates take the strip and sell it to newspapers and split the income with...
I used to make original snowmen, but it was time consuming, hard work. So I...
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations.
The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take this milk. Why do...
So, what's it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond...
Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience.