Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
Quote by Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx Quotes
All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my...
I chased a girl for two years only to discover that her tastes were exactly...
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I was...
Room service? Send up a larger room.
I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff...
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into...
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book -and does
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's...
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was...
It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.
I chased a woman for almost two years only to discover her tastes were exactly...
I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
The arrogance of age must submit to be taught by youth.
Though I look old, yet I am strong and lusty; for in my youth I...
I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a...