My own mother died when I was 10 years old. My folks have told me that what little humor I have comes from her. I can't remember her humor, but I can remember her love and understanding of me. Of…

Quote by Will Rogers

Topics: Humor Quotes

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny...

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny...

We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud...

We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud...

Things ain't what they used to be and never were.

Things ain't what they used to be and never were.

The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if...

The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if...

We know lots of things we didn't use to know but we don't know any...

We know lots of things we didn't use to know but we don't know any...

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has....

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has....

So live that you would not mind selling your pet parrot to the town gossip

So live that you would not mind selling your pet parrot to the town gossip

Diplomacy is the art of saying Nice doggie until you can find a rock.

Diplomacy is the art of saying Nice doggie until you can find a rock.

Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?

Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?

Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you...

Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you...

So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn...

So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn...

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year...

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year...

The schools ain't what they used to be and never was.

The schools ain't what they used to be and never was.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi...

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi...

If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable.

If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable.

Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you...

Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you...

Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country...

Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country...

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a...

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a...

An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.

An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.