Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Funny Quotes, Money Quotes

A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move...

A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move...

The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue...

The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue...

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

I took the speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It's...

I took the speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It's...

The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only...

The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only...

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.

Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.

It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when...

It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when...

Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of...

Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of...

Sex relieves tension - love causes it.

Sex relieves tension - love causes it.

I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my...

I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my...

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last...

The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last...

Everybody wants to eat at the government's table, but nobody wants to do the dishes.

Everybody wants to eat at the government's table, but nobody wants to do the dishes.

Economy does not lie in sparing money, but in spending it wisely.

Economy does not lie in sparing money, but in spending it wisely.

We can no longer allow Americas dependence on foreign oil to compromise our energy security....

We can no longer allow Americas dependence on foreign oil to compromise our energy security....