I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?

Quote by Drew Carey

Topics: Funny Quotes, Halloween Quotes

What also helps our show is that we never take ourselves seriously.

What also helps our show is that we never take ourselves seriously.

I'm not against ratings per se. I think more information is always good. But I...

I'm not against ratings per se. I think more information is always good. But I...

We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again.

We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again.

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has...

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has...

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with...

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with...

There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with...

There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with...

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for...

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for...

I wanted to do a show based on what my life would be like if...

I wanted to do a show based on what my life would be like if...

When the show's in production, we work for three weeks at a time and then...

When the show's in production, we work for three weeks at a time and then...

Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble -...

Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble -...

Some people don't like competition because it makes them work harder, better.

Some people don't like competition because it makes them work harder, better.

I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I...

The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I...

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither!

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither!

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for...

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for...

Hollywood people are filled with guilt: white guilt, liberal guilt, money guilt. They feel bad...

Hollywood people are filled with guilt: white guilt, liberal guilt, money guilt. They feel bad...

Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures.

Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures.

I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a...

When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a...