Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth and fresher breath.

Quote by Dave Barry

Topics: Funny Quotes, Internet Quotes, Television Quotes

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely...

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely...

A program is a spell cast over a computer, turning input into error messages

A program is a spell cast over a computer, turning input into error messages

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your...

Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your...

I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.

I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.

I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software...

I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software...

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely...

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely...

We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in...

We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in...

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage...

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage...

In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can...

In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

The difference between men and women is that, if given the choice between saving the...

The difference between men and women is that, if given the choice between saving the...

If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for...

If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for...

I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting,...

I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting,...

I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are...

I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are...

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument...

I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument...

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in...

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in...