The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

Quote by Dave Barry

Topics: Age Quotes, Funny Quotes

Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by...

Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by...

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of...

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of...

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a...

Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument...

I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument...

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count...

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count...

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who...

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who...

1996 also saw a huge expansion of the Internet, with many major corporations, afraid of...

1996 also saw a huge expansion of the Internet, with many major corporations, afraid of...

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely...

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely...

The rest of all the acts of Asa, and all his might, and all that...

The rest of all the acts of Asa, and all his might, and all that...

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

I don't pray for God to take my problems away, I pray only for God...

I don't pray for God to take my problems away, I pray only for God...

We aim in the domain of politics at republicanism; in the domain of economics at...

We aim in the domain of politics at republicanism; in the domain of economics at...

Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is...

Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is...