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Oh I offended you with my opinion?! You should hear the ones I keep to myself
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Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results
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I love my computer because my friends live in it
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New Year's Day is every man's birthday.
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Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions, chocolate understands.
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New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a...
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If you don't believe in ghosts, you've never been to a family reunion.
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May the internet bring you comfort when your family goes insane this holiday season
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If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as...
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Drink' till she's cute but stop before the wedding
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'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...
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Sex is a sensation caused by temptation. A guy sticks his location in a girl's...
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Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start...
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Sometimes I pretend to be normal. but it gets boring so I go back to...
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If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told...
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Each day is the opportunity to create more beautiful memories
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You can go your own way.
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A quiet man is a thinking man, a quiet women is hatching plan
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