New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a list of your resolutions! Give up jobs give up benefits Give up pensions Give up services Give up university Give up health care.

New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a list of your resolutions! Give up jobs give up benefits Give up pensions Give up services Give up university Give up health care.

Topics: Funny Picture Quotes, New Year Picture Quotes, New Year's resolution Picture Quotes

Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother. Santa wrote back: Send me your mother!

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Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother. Santa wrote back: Send me your mother!

I've got six kids. I'm not done. I'm going to keep having kids until I...

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I've got six kids. I'm not done. I'm going to keep having kids until I...

When I die I want my last words to be, I left a million dollars...

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When I die I want my last words to be, I left a million dollars...

No one will win the battle of the sexe, there is too much flirting with...

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No one will win the battle of the sexe, there is too much flirting with...

Sometimes the best part of my job is that my chair swivels

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Sometimes the best part of my job is that my chair swivels

Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright, Until you hear them...

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Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright, Until you hear them...

I like nonsense it wakes up the brain cells

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I like nonsense it wakes up the brain cells

I played Santa Claus many times, if you don't believe it, check out the divorce...

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I played Santa Claus many times, if you don't believe it, check out the divorce...

Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree; Your ornaments are history.

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Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree; Your ornaments are history.

Murphy's Law : Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself

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Murphy's Law : Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself

Every night, I have to read a book, so that my mind will stop thinking...

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Every night, I have to read a book, so that my mind will stop thinking...

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

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Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

May the internet bring you comfort when your family goes insane this holiday season

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May the internet bring you comfort when your family goes insane this holiday season

Joseph: "I'm going to buy them Christmas turkey". Albert: "Buy? Do you really mean buy?"...

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A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.

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A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.

I made me laugh

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I made me laugh

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. if you...

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By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. if you...

If I had not gone into Monty Python, I probably would have stuck to my...

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If I had not gone into Monty Python, I probably would have stuck to my...

Youâ€™re supposed to let go of the past and start off new. Youâ€™re supposed to...

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Youâ€™re supposed to let go of the past and start off new. Youâ€™re supposed to...

It's officially New Years Eve! You have less than 24 hrs to do ll the...

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It's officially New Years Eve! You have less than 24 hrs to do ll the...