We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again.

Quote by Drew Carey

Topics: Drew Carey Quotes

Nothing's funny about someone who's successful.

Nothing's funny about someone who's successful.

People laugh to forget their troubles, and to forget their troubles they like to look...

People laugh to forget their troubles, and to forget their troubles they like to look...

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with...

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with...

I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for...

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for...

There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with...

There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with...

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has...

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has...

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what...

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what...

I'm competitive at everything.

I'm competitive at everything.

Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can...

Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can...

Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures.

Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures.

Some people don't like competition because it makes them work harder, better.

Some people don't like competition because it makes them work harder, better.

Nevada's one of the most conservative states in the Union, but you can do what...

Nevada's one of the most conservative states in the Union, but you can do what...

That's the great thing about having your friends around you. I've known these guys forever....

That's the great thing about having your friends around you. I've known these guys forever....

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what...

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what...

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither!

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither!

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I...

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I...

Every murderer is probably somebody's old friend.

Every murderer is probably somebody's old friend.

Greatness is the dream of youth realized in old age.

Greatness is the dream of youth realized in old age.

Humans are the only animal who can have sex over the phone.

Humans are the only animal who can have sex over the phone.