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I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything...

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything...

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its...

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its...

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job

If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

Sex is better than talk...Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to...

Sex is better than talk...Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to...

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Pamela Andersons fingertips.

If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Pamela Andersons fingertips.

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...

How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...

The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue...

The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue...

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by...

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by...

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through...

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one...

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one...

Does anyone here work in advertising or marketing? Well if you do, when you get...

Does anyone here work in advertising or marketing? Well if you do, when you get...

Comedy is an escape, not from truth but from despair; a narrow escape into faith.

Comedy is an escape, not from truth but from despair; a narrow escape into faith.

I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like...

I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like...

It is impossible to love and be wise.

It is impossible to love and be wise.

The person who grieves suffers his passion to grow upon him; he indulges it, he...

The person who grieves suffers his passion to grow upon him; he indulges it, he...

I've been aware of death since I was a little girl. My only regret willl...

I've been aware of death since I was a little girl. My only regret willl...